PRT 344- “Delusions”

"This is gonna be a big weekend!" Jessica said.

"I know! We better start planning." I replied.

“AND cut!” the director cried, “Good work. Prepare for the next scene.”

I was in a studio filming a commercial for the CMA’s with Jessica Simpson. I was upset still and didn’t really wanna be here, but I knew I needed to keep working.

“I’m glad you agreed to do this. It’s been forever since I’ve seen you.” Jessica said.

“Yeah, I know! It’s crazy.” I said.

“No kidding. Busy lives.”

“Very. By the way, I did listen to your country album. There’s some good stuff there.”

“Thanks! Hey, we’re both doing that other show, right?”

“Yeah, “I Get That A Lot”? Yup.”

“It should be cool.”

“Yeah, totally. A couple of my friends I haven’t seen in awhile are doing it.”

“Awesome.”

“We get briefed on our tasks later today.”

Jess nodded, “I’m headed to that studio soon as we finish up here.”

“Oh, cool, you wanna ride over together?”

“Sure!”

And we did. After we finished the CMA spot we headed over to another studio. We walked in the room where the celebrities were gathering and the first person I saw was AC, my former co-star on ‘PH’/ex-boyfriend (we dated for like a split second on the show…like a couple of weeks).

“HEY!” I cried. I hadn’t seen him in years.

“Michi, hey!” he said as he hugged me, lifting me off the ground.

“How are you?”

“I’m great. How are you?”

“I’m getting by.”

He let me go and I stood in front of him.

“I talked to Zack, he seems worried about you.” AC said.

I looked at him, “Why?”

“Because I think everyone is worried about you. He said something about Mina and RJ both calling him.”

“Everyone needs to get off my case…I’m fine.”

“Like you were ‘fine’ back in the day?”

I rolled my eyes, “I was a messed up 12 year old kid then. I’m a mature, well-adjusted, together adult now. I’m fine.”

“Mature, I’ll give you. Well-adjusted and together? Not seeing it.”

“Stop playing big brother. I have two of those…three kinda.”

“Yeah, I heard you did a slip on your ‘kinda big brother’ and the rest of your security.”

“My god gossip travels fast.”

“This is Hollywood Mich, you know there are no secrets.”

“No frickin’ kidding! Listen, you haven’t been in my life for many years, you don’t know anything about me anymore.”

“I’m still your friend and I care.”

“Which is why I saw you reporting about the supposed ‘affair’ I had on your tabloid show. Is that what this is about? Are you trying to get some exclusive gossip?”

“Michelle! No! Listen, I host the show, it’s a job. You think it’s easy to report news on my friends?”

“Gossip.”

“Whatever. I tried to kill the story but it was too big. We had to cover it. If you want to come on the show and tell your side I’d be happy to give you all the airtime you want.”

“I knew it. That’s what this is about. You want an exclusive. Everyone wants something…everytime. You’re no different.”

“That isn’t true and you know it. I’m Zack’s best friend and you’re like a kid sister to me.”

“Whatever, I see exactly what’s happening here. Mia was right. I can’t trust anyone.”

“Mia?”

“Yes, my only real friend.” I said as I walked away.

“Michelle, wait…”

I ignored him.

So the premise of this show is that the producers sent us to do ‘normal’ jobs and when/if people recognize us we were to deny our identity with the line ‘I get that a lot’.” It was your basic hidden camera show. My job was at a diner. I was gonna be a waitress. That worked for me because I’d helped out at JKP quite a few times in different capacities so I knew how to work at a restaurant.

After we had our schedules for shooting I headed out. I got back to my apartment and went inside. RJ was in the kitchen rinsing some dishes.

“Hi.” I said.

“Hey Sweetie.” He said as he came out of the kitchen and kissed me.

“How was your day?”

“Fine. I’m off the rest of the day. Lily and Theo seem to have things under control at JKP.”

“Cool. I’m off today too. My filming isn’t for a couple of days.”

“That’s great. I was hoping we could spend some time together.”

“Ok.”

“What do you want to do?”

“I don’t care.”

“Ty called. He wants to know if you still require security.”

“No, I don’t.”

“I told him yes. MJ, I think you should keep the security around.”

“I don’t need them. I’m fine.”

RJ pulled me into his arms, “You’re not fine MJ, not by any stretch of the imagination. I’m really worried about you.”

“I’m fine! Why is everyone treating me like I’m broken?!” I cried.

“MJ, calm down.”

“No! I’m sick of being talked to like I need fixing! Maybe it’s everyone else that needs fixing!”

“MJ…”

“Don’t MJ me! I know you’re only here because you feel sorry for me! You’re never around anymore unless you’re ‘worried’. I don’t need your pity! Just get out!” I screamed.

“Whoa…MJ…I do love you, you know that…”

“I said get out!!!” I screamed louder.

“No!” RJ yelled back, which kinda caught me off guard since he never yelled.

I paused, “GET OUT!” I screamed again.

“MJ calm down! It’ll be ok!”

“NO IT WON’T! I can’t trust anyone anymore! I’m alone! I’m alone!” I said as I started to cry.

“You’re not alone MJ, I’m here. I’m always here for you.” RJ said as he pulled me into a hug.

I tried to get away, “Let me go!”

“No…MJ…I love you. I’m here.” He whispered as he held me tighter.

I stopped squirming and just sobbed.

“It’ll be ok.” RJ said as he pulled me to the ground and held me.

RJ

~~

After MJ’s massive breakdown I was more concerned than ever. I had to stop being distant and get the annulment idea out of my head completely. If I left MJ now I didn’t know what she’d do. She needed me and I had to be there for her.

“Shh, it’s ok.” I whispered as I gently rocked her.

She continued to cry. She finally fell asleep in my arms about half an hour later. She’d exhausted herself. I carried her to bed and tucked her in then I closed the bedroom door behind me as I went into the living room. I picked up the phone and dialed Mina’s number.

“She had another break down.” I said

“Oh no…it was bad?” Mina asked.

“Beyond bad. She was screaming at me to leave her alone and sobbing. I finally calmed her down and she fell asleep. Mina, she’s breaking. I don’t know what to do.”

Mina sighed, “I’m not sure there’s anything we can do.”

“Hunter won’t help her. Maybe Rocky could help?”

“No! I mean…Rocky would just make things worse. Trust me.”

“Ok. You know him better than I do. I’ll take your word on that.”

“I’m at a loss. Last time she was anywhere near this bad was when she and Hunter broke up.”

“Really? What happened? How did she come out of it?”

“I found her about to jump off a roof at a New Zealand hotel. I talked her down and we did a short tour before I convinced her to go home and deal with it.”

“Work doesn’t seem to be helping her this time.”

“I know. I’m not sure what will.”

“We’re losing her.”

“I know…”

Mina

~~~~

I hung up with RJ and sighed. I thought about that day in New Zealand back in 2004.

Michelle’s mom had called me and told me she was really worried about Mich. I managed to track her down in New Zealand. She wasn’t in her room. It was storming outside. A lot of thunder and lightning. I wasn’t sure if it was natural or supernatural. If Michelle was firing off lightning she’d be on the roof. I ran up to the roof and found her on the edge. She looked like she was about to jump.

“MICHELLE STOP!” I cried.

She turned around. “What are you doing here?”

“Saving you ass, now get away from the edge.” I said reaching for her hand. She gave me her hand and I pulled her away from the edge. I pulled her into a hug. She hugged me back and started to sob. She slipped to the ground and I sat by her and held her as she cried and cried. The water washed over us.

An hour or so later I helped her back to my room and we got dry clothes on then I helped her to bed. When she was lying down I sat next to her.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“Your mom called me. She said you sounded really bad and she was worried…with reason I would say. And I wasn’t about to let my best friend do something dangerous so I told Adam I had to be with you. He agreed and said he’d be there when I got home.” I explained.

She nodded. “Well, thanks…”

“So what were you thinking?”

“I called Hunter. He said he’s happy now and he doesn’t regret us breaking up.”

“Oh Mich…” I said as I held her hand. I stayed with her until she fell asleep.

Once she was sleeping I pulled out my laptop and wrote Tommy and e-mail. I knew he had to be worried…and after when I witnessed I was beyond worried.

~Tommy,

There’s something you should know…and while I’m not sure it’s my place to tell you…you do need to know. I decided to join Michelle on tour and I got here just in time. Something happened between Hunter and Mich I think and whatever it was piled on what happened with you and her sent her over the edge.

Tommy, when I found her she was about to jump off the roof of the hotel. She was planning on killing herself. I don’t know what to do. She’s my best friend and like a sister to me and I’m not sure how to handle this. You’ve known her longer and you know her better. You have to do something to help her before it’s too late. I’m watching her now but if she decided to do something again I might not be able to stop her. It’s up to us to keep her safe now. Again, I’m not sure it was my place to tell you this but I thought you should know.

Mina~

After I sent the email I called Adam.

“Hello?”

“Adam? Hey, it’s me.”

“Mina, is everything ok?”

“No. When I found Mich she was on the edge of a hotel roof. She was considering jumping.”

“What? Are you serious?”

“Yeah, cause I’d joke about that.”

“Sorry…of course you’re serious. My god…is she ok?”

“Physically yeah. I talked her down. Mentally and emotionally…I don’t think so. I’m not sure what to do. Something happened with Hunter. I’m not sure what but something.”

“Oh god. Hunter is going to be the end of her.”

“If she lets him, yes, he will me.”

“Mina, be careful. If she’s that far gone you don’t know what she’ll do.”

“I’ll be careful. I promise.”

“Ok. I love you.”

“I love you too. Goodnight.”

The next morning when I woke up I decided to go get some food for Mich. I had a sneaking suspicion she hadn’t been eating properly. I picked up some breakfast and went to her room. I sat there until she woke up.

“Have you even eaten since this tour started?” I asked when she was awake.

“Well…um…a bit.” She replied.

“Not enough…eat.” I said handing her a bagel.

She sighed. “I’m not hungry.”

“Too damn bad. Eat.” I commanded.

“Fine, fine.” She said eating.

“So when are we going home?” I asked.

“Never.”

“Mich…you can’t just give up for good. Like it or not you are the Purple Ranger. There’s no escaping that.”

“But…I can’t go back.”

“You have to.”

“Why?”

“The fate of the world?”

“What?”

“Tommy wouldn’t have given you the Purple Gem if he didn’t really need you to have it.”

She sighed. “Ok, 2 more shows?”

“How many days?”

“3?”

“Ok, deal.” I said. I knew this was the best I was gonna get out of her.

“So you gonna be my right hand chick again?”

I laughed, “You know it”

“Good, that studio player just doesn’t play off me the way you do.”

“That happens when you get someone who doesn’t know your every move.”

“I’m just glad you do. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” she said hugging me.

“Enough of this huggie stuff. We have a show to prepare for. Sound checks to do and all that.”

“Ok…let’s go.” She said getting up. She got dressed and we headed out.

I sighed. I’d managed to help her this time but for some reason she was so paranoid that she didn’t trust me anymore. She wouldn’t answer my calls and she seemed convinced I was trying to take the company out from under her…which was so not what I was trying to do.

I didn’t know what to do. Hunter refused to help and Ronny refused to talk to him. Rocky was the source of most of this. Finally I had a thought. It was a very scary thought and I hated the fact I even thought of it. There was one person that had known Mich longer and better than anyone. One person, other than Hunter, that could get to her on a very deep level. I didn’t like him and certainly didn’t want to call him…but I was desperate. I had to do something. Last time Michelle broke down she became evil and nearly killed Tommy. Nemesis had one Sailor Saturn already. If she got the other one we were toast.

I picked up the phone and dialed.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Jon? It’s Mina.”

“Mina, hi. What can I do for you?”

“I…I…I…ugh…I need your help.”

“Help? With what?”

“Michelle. I’m worried about her. She’s having a breakdown and she needs someone to talk some sense into her.”

“She has a husband.”

“I know, and he’s not getting through to her.”

“What about Hunter?”

“He refuses to help.”

“What? Seriously? I knew he was a sorry, good for nothing…”

“Jon, focus…”

“Right, sorry.” Jon let out a snide laugh, “Of course I’ll help Michelle. What can I do?”

“Talk to her.”

“Alright. I will give her a call when I get a chance.”

“Thanks.”

“I’d do anything for Michi, you know that.”

“Yeah…I guess. Anyway, thanks again. Bye.”

“Bye.”

I hung up and sighed. I hoped I hadn’t just made things worse.

RJ

~~

“Holly, you have to stop booking events for her. She’s falling apart.” I said. I had called Holly to try to get MJ a break.

“I have a couple of things books that I can’t get her out of. I feel for her RJ, honestly, I do…but she told me she wants to keep working…and she is my client.”

“She doesn’t know what she wants Holly. She thinks Mina is trying to take Starlight Records from her…today she screamed at me to get out of the apartment. You don’t realize how bad things have gotten. MJ isn’t MJ anymore.”

“I don’t understand what happened. This seems so sudden. What triggered this?”

“It was everything. Too much happened all at once.”

“Poor girl.”

“Exactly.”

“I’ll try to limit what I schedule for her…but RJ, she wants to work and we both have jobs to do.”

“Just try to keep it to a minimum.”

“OK.”

“Thank you Hol.”

“You know I’d do anything for you RJ. And I really like Michelle. I think you’ve got a great girl.”

“I do. She’s amazing. And I’m so worried about her.”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine. She seems really strong.”

“She is…but even strong people have breaking points.”

“You’ll help her be strong. It’ll be ok RJ.”

“Thanks Holly.”

“I have to go. I have a meeting, but I’ll talk to you soon. Take care.”

“You too.”

I hung up just as there was a knock on the door. I went an answered it.

“Hi, is Mich here?” a woman asked.

“She’s asleep. Who are you?” I asked.

“Mia Blackwood. You must be RJ. Michelle’s told me a lot about you.”

“Mia, right, she mentioned you’ve been a good friend recently. It’s nice to meet you. Come on in.”

“Thanks.” Mia said as she came inside, “How is she?”

“Not good. She had a meltdown and started screaming at me. I finally talked her down and she eventually fell asleep.”

“Oh wow…poor thing.” Mia said.

“Thanks for spending time with her. I’m glad there’s someone she’s not shutting out.”

“I’m just glad to be able to help. Michelle seems like a really sweet person.”

“She is. She’s sweet and loving and absolutely amazing. She’s just been dealing with so much lately and I guess a person can only take so much sometimes.”

“Right. I’m sure she’ll snap out of it.”

“Well if you have any idea to help that’s great cause I’m at a loss.”

“Don’t worry RJ. I’ll take care of Michelle…I promise.” Mia said.

I didn’t know why, but for some reason Mia saying that almost worried me more…